Boobs and the Bra Struggle

I remember hearing as a teen 34C was the perfect bra size. I happened to actually be that size for a quick minute and I did in fact believe it was perfect. I could buy a cute bra for a reasonable price anywhere. It was great and I didn't want to change, so when my stupid boobs kept growing I fought it and dealt with a miserable case of double boob for a while. Eventually my friends told me to get over myself and get some bras that fit. So I guess about 16 was the last time I was a normal size. Although I was probably wearing the wrong size, I didn’t know you were supposed to wear bras on the loosest hook to allow for stretching. 


So what are normal sizes? Normal sizes are the sizes you can find at Target.* Normal size boobs can find bras that are cute and cheap easily. WHY?? Why are these damn sizes the ones that come in fun colors and don’t cost a fortune? I’d love to be able to accidentally throw my bra in the dryer and not give a fuck.  34B, 36C, 38D, oh you lucky bitches. Over the course of pregnancy, nursing, weight gain and loss I’ve been everything from a 30DD to a 34G and back again. Oh did you know bras come in a 30 band size? Probably not unless you’ve been shopping for training bras lately because the only 30 band at Target is in the kids section. (Yes I love Target. If I could buy a regular bra there it would be my one stop shop.) But I don't wear a 30A so that's out too.


I still remember being told to try a 30 DD at this fancy euro bra shop in SF. I was thrilled to find 32D’s there, which were hard enough to find at the time. I basically said fuck that and left. Yeah a 27 inch under-bust made for a great hourglass figure as a young chick (I’ve never been a lady), but trying to find a bathing suit that was big enough for my boobs and they didn’t fall out of the bottom was a chore. Too bad under-boob wasn’t in then.  

Bye Bye pretty things

So now I’ve lost a bunch of weight and I’m that size again. ** I know, no one feels bad for a skinny bitch, but this is my damn story. And really every breast size and shape has its own challenges, small band big cup and large band small cup are both problematic and often stuck in sports bras.  Luckily, I’m just not that into bras being that tight anymore, so I can stick with a 32D and that's easily findable online. If I lose another 3lbs though, these shriveled up nutsack-looking things I used to call boobs will lose another cup size, and I’ll have to start the bra search all over again. Since I’ve tried so much crap online (Thirdlove, True and Co, Savage X Fenty and more) and I’ve switched sizes so recently, I feel like this is a great time to share my bra knowledge. I’ve gone from big-boob problems to small in a matter of months, not to mention nursing bra problems not too long ago. So get ready to hear more. Currently I have 6 bras en route from Lively. Lively has a nice selection of wireless bras and bralettes I’m hoping will be an upgrade from the sports bras I’m dealing with now. While I do like a nice underwire contour bra when I want to look cute and pretend my tits are still high and perky, COVID-world just does not require wires daily. 


* Target is my barometer for life apparently

To be clear, I'd wear a bikini either way. This is
more of a gratuitous bikini shot than a before and after
.

** major life changes, I’m not getting into this blog but I’m 5’4” and 130lbs, healthy BMI for my height is 110-145lbs so I’m right in the middle. I’m not skinny, I’m just right. Though oddly enough, people are much more concerned with me losing weight and getting "too skinny" than they ever were about me gaining it.  And I eat a lot now, unlike when I was 22 and 130lbs and just ate breakfast, wine and whiskey. I actually feel like a million bucks at anything under 150. My thought was to lose a little extra and when I hit menopause I can gain 10lbs and not give a FUCK!

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